Thursday, March 17, 2011

Dogs Have Masters....

Cats have staff.

And Jupiter, approximately two years old this month, has me.

I did not quite understand this until two years into what promises to be one of my longer relationships, I noticed he had trained me to do the following:

* play with him when he wants to play
* not play with him when he doesn't want to play
* wake up when he wants me to wake up
* cuddle when he wants me to cuddle
* feed him what he likes
* not feed him what he doesn't like
* be polite about his displeasure at me preparing to leave the house
* share my popcorn with him
* throw the ball and then fetch it for him. Repeatedly.
* yes he will go on the kitchen counter and what do you mean not the stove
* move the bureau so he can crawl under it
* open the curtains
* open the window
* type with one hand because he needs me to scratch his ear with the other

As the Con Edison Meter Reader Lady said as she stepped over him to get to the meter, "He doesn't have to move. It's his house."

Two years ago, nobody warned me. Now it's too late.


Anonymous said...

It's funny and it's true. You wouldn't have it any other way would you?
I have only been able to train a cat to do two things. Stay off the counters and table accomplished by leaving sheets of wax paper all over both when I left the house. (hop,skid,plop..okay, I'll stay off) and stay away from the Christmas tree by using the water sprayer method. After a few times all I had to do was put the empty sprayer under the tree. (that was our Rockie baby)
Just think of all the story lines he has given you.

c.o. moed said...

LOL! amazing.

well I am beginning to understand that having a cat is like being married. You can read all the books you want ahead of time and then the reality repeatedly hits you in the head at 6am in the morning expecting to be fed the cat food he wants.

Anonymous said...

having a cat is easier than being married ANY day....I mean, how many men would be satisfied with a bowl of water, a bowl of kibble and a litter box? (come to think of it, how many men could you train to use a litter box?)

Alana said...

too funny! I LOVE these!, the posts and the comments!

Elisabeth Lohninger said...

he is a very sweet companion! and yes, i know exactly what you mean!