Friday, April 5, 2013

Friday's Child Is Loving And Giving: Happy Endings, PARTAAAAY, And The Love Of Your Life Waiting For You

HAPPY ENDINGS!

PRETZEL DOODLE ROBERTS 
(FORMERLY CINNAMON) 
GOT ADOPTED! 
Pretzel Doodle Roberts (formerly Cinnamon),  a 2-year-old super handsome and friendly Dachshund, was adopted last week! He had been rescued by the ASPCA, with whom Social Tees works, from a hoarding case. Social Tees found him an amazingly perfect home TWO DAYS after he arrived!  His new "dad" works from home so they spend tons of quality time together, and they live right near Madison Square Park -- this pup is living the life!


LAUGH YOUR HEAD OFF AND HELP RESCUE AT THE SAME TIME!!!!!




THIS WEEK'S FRIDAY CHILD:  

Interested in the next LOVE OF YOUR LIFE???  

Meet Penny!!!!


Penny is a 45-pound, 3 year-old pittie mix full of snuggles! 

She was found tied to a post in the cold, but from her great personality you wouldn't know she was poorly cared for!! 

 Her foster mom says: "Penny is a real sweetie who looooooves people. With her beautiful rust-colored coat and compact muscular build, people in the street are constantly complimenting her. She has a lot of energy outside, loves to play fetch, and is a great running partner. She is very calm indoors and is always up for a cuddle! She has been learning basic training: sit, down, and leash training, which should be continued. She also loves her stuffed animals. Penny would be so happy to have people to shower with doggy kisses.” 

Penny doesn't do well with other dogs or cats, so she needs to be the only pet in your home. She's a glutton for attention! 

Please email samantha.socialtees@gmail.com if you'd like to meet this special girl. She's waiting for you!


How old:  3years
How big:  45 pounds of snuggling!

CONTACT

Samantha:
samantha.socialtees@gmail.com
 
Social Tees 
325 East 5th Street, NY, NY 10003; 
5-7pm Mon to Fri; 
12-4pm Sat & Sun; 
212-614-9653; 
socialteesnyc.org

If you can't adopt Penny today, share the news and spread the love!

***

Related Post:

Going Where It's Warm 

 

 


Thursday, April 4, 2013

God In The Details


photo: J.L. Wong

"OCCUPY ME", a small romp through decades of accumulation that happened when no one was looking just got published in TRIVIA!

Getting the announcement, I missed Florence. Work was where we met, and saw and heard one another.  Not my personal life (with the exception of Joni), not my make-money-pay-rent life, not the small joys or the big hopes, not even illness or adventures to lands she had never visited.  Just work - the work that required sitting down and dropping in deep to places very few went.

In those moments where we kept each other rare company, we were not just invisible women behind closed studio doors.  We were artists.

***

Picture
TRIVIA, deriving from "tri-via" (crossroads), was one of the names of the Triple Goddess. Recognizing that what is of primary importance in and about women's lives tends to be relegated to the margins of patriarchal history and thought, dismissed as "trivial," we conceive TRIVIA: Voices of Feminism as a place at the crossroads where women's ideas, words, and images can assume their original power and significance. We operate with (and within) an expansive definition of feminism, one that recognizes diversity of thought and practice across boundaries and borders of all kinds.

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Dust To Dust And Then New Cities Rose

On the left:  
Uncle George sitting at the feet of Seymour 
at Camp Henry some summer in the 1930's.


Henry Street Settlement's sleep-away camp must have been paradise to them, since they had spent most of their young lives on the Lower East Side either hoping not to get beaten or getting over getting beaten.


Seymour stayed behind in New York.  George briefly dated Florence and it's up in the air if she was madly in love with him or Seymour, but she married Seymour.  George, after his WWII stint headed out.  Got a couple of degrees including a PhD and eventually landed in California.

But his life, like Seymour's, was haunted by those beatings, the poverty, the misery, the rats, the going hungry, the witnessing of horrors inside the tenement, outside on the street.  His sunny suburb 3,000 miles away from where he had started couldn't keep ghosts away from his dreams, his waking hours, his happiness.  So, like Seymour, he kept keys in locks to keep from becoming the worst of his past.


You can lock doors, but ghosts have a habit of slipping in through the cracks.

After rubble cleared and many things ended, there were small spaces of respite:  Seymour now retired and living in California, a third new marriage for George, tons of food, no rats, and their children finally grown and far away, not reminding the brothers that despite their best efforts and their heartfelt desires, they had failed to truly be different from whence they came.  Still, they had each other, company to keep in the midst of old echos from past battles.

And we, their daughters - sisters and cousins to one another - somehow rose from their lives and somehow built what they had maybe wished for during those summer days in Camp Henry.

George died yesterday. He was 90.   At 92, Seymour will one day follow him. 


**
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Summer Reruns: a) Inheritance b) Neighborhood c) Heritage d) All Of The Above: Part 2

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Sunday, March 31, 2013

Sunday Memories: Hiding And Then Seeking


I always thought it was called Cache-Cache.   But today the plaque clearly read Hide and Seek.

In the old museum, then just the museum, this painting hung in a small gallery off the beaten track.  A old bench faced it and that's where, when things at home got too searing, I'd go and hide.

Admission must not have been too much, otherwise how could a 12 or 13 or 14 or 15 year old girl afford to visit such a painting so frequently?

I would find that painting and bench and then sit there and wait.  Wait for myself to disappear into the big painting so I could explore each and every one of the millions of little paintings filling every inch of the canvas. I saw my beginning and my ending and in between, I looked for hope in rich colors and secret shapes.

That's not possible now.



The new museum is very fancy, it costs a bunch to get in (unless you have friends in high places) and there are now many escalators and bathrooms and glass balconies that make all the winding galleries flow into one another so that everyone can easily swim upstream to see something else amazing they've only seen in postcards or something completely incomprehensible, whereupon nothing stops them from make loud fun of it before they swim off to another vaulting hall.

This painting isn't in any of those galleries.  It hangs in one of the waiting area outside one of the many bathrooms at the top of one of the numerous escalators.


Like a mural on a subway station wall, it is there to make the passage pretty and when it does get noticed, it's captured into a small screen that could never, ever reveal all its mysteries and the nooks and corners I carefully tucked myself into.

**
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Friday, March 29, 2013

Friday's Child Is Loving And Giving: Happy Endings, Did You Know, And The Love Of Your Life Waiting For You

HAPPY ENDINGS!


PIMM GOT ADOPTED!!!



PIMM, a stunning long haired merle two year old dachshund had been rescued from a hoarding situation by the ASPCA.  Social Tees Rescue came to the rescue and got Pimm a forever home with one of their favorite couples ever! They live near Prospect Park (dog heaven!) and they have another small dog named Bruno.  Pimm and Bruno are BBF already. This is one of those stories where everyone is living happily ever after!

DID YOU KNOW IT'S EASY TO LEND A HAND?

So you can't adopt but you want to help and you want to help but you can't adopt.


NOT TO WORRY!

MURRAY WOULD LOVE A FOSTER OR A FOREVER HOME!
Become a foster parent!!!  That basically means temporary ownership until Social Tees finds the animal a forever home. Cat fosters bring their foster cats to the Social Tees events at the Petco in Union Square on weekends.

If you have a little extra time or space or both, Social Tees has a basic FAQ on their website (socialteesnyc.org), and people can email Social Tees/ Samantha directly if they want to foster or have questions! 

CONTACT

Samantha:
samantha.socialtees@gmail.com


THIS WEEK'S FRIDAY CHILD:


Interested in the next LOVE OF YOUR LIFE???

Meet Mazzie!

She's the white pit being LUUUUVED by her "foster sister" Chicken. 

Mazzie is currently being fostered by a wonderful local guy and his dog.  AND she's up for adoption! 

She's extremely good with dogs, cats, and kids One of her eyes is cloudy because she likely got an injury when she was younger, and her previous neglectful owner didn't take care of it properly -- but she can see through it! She was found roaming the streets on the Lower East Side. If people want to meet her, email Social Tees.  

Her foster dad says: "The most notable thing about Mazzie is how sweet she it. She constantly looks for affection and actually purrs when she gets it. She has the perfect balance of energy and is a total wiggle-butt! Not only is she super squishy, she has a big personality that stands out in the crowd. Mazzie is also well behaved and eager to please. She is very, very affectionate; I call her an 'aggressive cuddler' because I rarely wake in the morning in the same position I went to sleep in the night before."

OK, if that doesn't say LUUUUUV OF YOUR LIFE, I don't know what does!
 
How old:  2 years
How big:  50 pounds of luuuuuuuuuv.


CONTACT

Samantha:
samantha.socialtees@gmail.com
 
Social Tees 
325 East 5th Street, NY, NY 10003; 
5-7pm Mon to Fri; 
12-4pm Sat & Sun; 
212-614-9653; 
socialteesnyc.org

If you can't adopt Mazzie today, share the news and spread the love!

***

Related Post:

Going Where It's Warm


Thursday, March 28, 2013

It Would Have Been Enough


If the apartment was warm and safe
It would have been enough

If the table had enough food on it
It would have been enough

If healing kept unfolding because help had been given so freely
It would have been enough

If curiosity had never stopped insisting bad days walk into possible tomorrows
It would have been enough

If willingness had stomped forward and illuminated sad, unkempt corners of the soul
It would have been enough

If friends stood for what was possible, had been the living example of secret dreams
It would have been enough

If an inheritance of brilliant dreaming stayed tight to the heart, defying despair and failure
It would have been enough

If Love had just said hello
It would have been enough...

Dayenu.

**
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In Honor of and with Gratitude for: The Carol Burnett Fun and Joy Project 

Leaving Egypt On The Promise Of A Healed Knee

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Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Spring Cleaning The Spring Cleaners


The pipes under the kitchen sink finally splintered into a thousand pieces.

In the excavation, a bottle emerged.  It had either been there when I arrived 37 years ago or had come to stay shortly after.

Obviously, over the ensuing years, it had been inconceivable to throw it out because you never knew when you might needed to emergency polish something.  Instead of running out to some drug store in the middle of the night, this kinda-almost full bottle was always there to fall back on.

But looking at the old bottle, I had to accept that no matter how reluctant I felt throwing out something that still had something in it,  the fact was that any liquid other than booze that was still good after almost four decades under an old sink could not be good for anything that breathed or showed other signs of living.  It, along with some other toxic cleaners which had been hidden from view would be given to a recycling event and hopefully released safely to their final resting place without harming animals, wildlife, vegetation or humans.

However, it did remind me of the couch we grew up with.

Bought in 1961, it was a fold-out sleeper in subtle turquoise and blues displaying extraordinary taste and success.  When things ended for all of us, it moved to my father's divorcé apartment down the street from his former marital home

He sat on that couch for quite some time before heading to greener pastures in California.  Charged with emptying out his New York apartment, it was clear to me that couch had no life left in it.  But that did not stop him from arguing that it was a "good couch" and somehow I should take it in and sit on it as he had.  In his world, nothing got thrown out.  Nothing got unused.  Nothing went wasted.

I appreciate my reluctance to discard something even when it was quite past its usefulness or purpose.  It is a trait inherited from two people who had grown up cherishing the privilege of having enough money to buy something.

**
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Sunday, March 24, 2013

Sunday Memories: In Honor Of Past Exoduses


 We both knew how to live in recognizable surroundings.

But that's not where promises are kept.

Glancing over my shoulder there was the desert, forty years worth.

Then I walked on.


**

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Friday, March 22, 2013

Friday's Child Is Loving And Giving: Happy Endings, Helpful Hints, And The Love Of Your Life Waiting For You


HAPPY ENDINGS!

COOL CAT BOB GOT ADOPTED!!!!! 


Because everyone repost and spread of the love, tons of folks visited him at the Petco adoption happening this past weekend.  His new family swooped him up!  We'll keep you updated! 

DID YOU KNOW?

Long-hair cats get surrendered by their owners more than other cats.  Why?

Because when their hair on their backside doesn't get trimmed or groomed by their owners, they can't clean themselves properly.  Thus, they stop using their litter boxes.  So if you like long-hair cats, be sure to trim or brush their bottoms regularly. 

THIS WEEK'S FRIDAY CHILD:

Interested in the next LOVE OF YOUR LIFE???

Meet Poppie! 

Photo: WHO'S THIS CHARMING FOX-FACED FELLOW?
It's Poppie! This little Corgi/Chihuahua mix has a coat of fur like a rabbit and a heart of gold. He's a little shy, but he's super quiet and sweet and snuggles up for affection when you bend down to pet him. He's great with cats and other dogs, but all he really wants is a family to cuddle with! He's 6 years old and about 20 pounds but needs to lose a couple. He's patiently waiting for his loving forever home!

Come meet Poppie (and our other awesome animals!) at 325 East 5th Street, NY, NY 10003; 5-7pm Mon to Fri; 12-4pm Sat & Sun; 212-614-9653; socialteesnyc.org

With fur like a bunny and a heart of gold, this shy little Corgi/Chihuahua mix is super quiet and super-duper sweet and snuggles up for affection when you bend down to pet him. 

BONUS!!! He's great with cats and other dogs, 

BUT, all he really needs is a family to cuddle with! 

How old: 6 years old

How big:  20 pounds but needs to lose a few - perfect if you are starting a new exercise program for yourself!

CONTACT:

Social Tees
325 East 5th Street, NY, NY 10003; 
5-7pm Mon to Fri; 
12-4pm Sat & Sun; 
212-614-9653; 
socialteesnyc.org

If you can't adopt him today, share the news and spread the love!


***
Related Post:

Going Where It's Warm

Thursday, March 21, 2013

One Year's Meat Is Another Year's Poison. Or Piggybank.


Seymour smoked.  Florence smoked.  In those days it was like drinking coffee or putting ketchup on your burger.

When they got married in 1947 or 48, someone gave them a bubble-glass ashtray for a wedding present.

It did its job like the rest of the stuff in the house. 

But then smoking got definitely bad for you, not just kinda a lousy habit, but really really bad.

Florence offered me and Louise $100 or maybe it was more if we didn't smoke until we were old.  Like twenty-one.  Louise made her pay up.

The rest of us quit here and there.  And then finally.

So the ashtray, along with all the other accoutrements of lighting up, had to find a new job.

**

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Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Gratitude Never Comes Out In The Wash


Some people think fancy cars are the sign of arriving.  Or the right house in the right neighborhood.   The purse that costs as much as a semester at City College.  How about that watch the guy on the  IRT #5 kept talking about LOUDLY, which is how I found out it cost the same as two months of my health insurance...

My favorite watch is the self-winding Timex my dad got for a dollar at a yard sale and the over-size purse I use most these days was $5.99 at a thrift store.  Only later did I find out it was a diaper bag for a hipster-type mom.  And the home I have rented for almost forty years didn't start out in the "right neighborhood" (although how "right" it is now is seriously up for debate). 

What I dream of or wish I had more money for comes and goes - sometimes it's the desire for a weekly massage and sometimes it's the millions  of bucks that could stop the slaughter of elephants while micro-financing thousands of women's new businesses.

But, until those flush days come, what lets me know I've arrived is the thrill of living in a city that has power and water and lets me turn dials and press buttons so I can do laundry in the middle of the night wearing not much beyond my hopes and my pajamas.

 ** Related Posts:

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Sunday, March 17, 2013

Sunday Memories: Food On The Run


Florence and I weren't typically close.  We were magnets that either repelled or slapped together at such high speed we were never sure how it would turn out.

So, until she crumpled into an illness we didn't understand and couldn't defy, we didn't talk every day like some mothers and daughters.

However, when we did occasionally check in on the phone or the rare times she'd actually come upstairs after calling from the payphone on the corner, the conversation would meander about until it landed where it always did.

"What did you do today?" I'd ask.

"Ate my way up and down Sixth Avenue," she'd answer.

And then she'd regale me with each and every stop made at each and every fast food place she had seen advertised on TV.  Those commercials she watched at home alone with the television brought in after we had all left to our own lives were as powerful as the stories Dorothy heard about Oz

Striding up and down streets and avenues seeking the next promise of the wizard, she'd barely ever stop and sit.

I, of course, adored food, went to restaurants, sat down, and then emailed friends about what I just ate.

Yet, interwoven in between my rebellion against eating on the run, I often found myself  striding up streets, relishing something in my hand that cost less that a couple of bucks, and just this past night, as I sailed fast across familiar waters, I sat briefly on old benches I had known since I was a kid, dining on something that could have come from Oz. 

**
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Friday, March 15, 2013

Friday's Child Is Loving And Giving: Cool Cat Bob, The Angora!

Her New York is teaming up with Social Tees Animal Rescue!

Every Friday features a wonderful Friday Child that is waiting 
to join someone's family and make their house a home.



Rumor has it that Cool Cat Bob, the Angora inspired the line "Cool Cat looking for a kitty, gonna look in every corner of the city...." 

With his super fluffy silky medium length coat of fur, six-year old Bob is so calm and cool, it's why you can't see his spectacular yellow eyes.  

Social Tees
325 East 5th Street, NY, NY 10003; 
5-7pm Mon to Fri; 
12-4pm Sat & Sun; 
212-614-9653; 
socialteesnyc.org

If you can't adopt him today, he'll be hanging loose and cool at Petco / Union Square Saturday 12-4pm.

***
Related Post:

Going Where It's Warm

Thursday, March 14, 2013

When The Wall Welcomed The Woman


The massive change that swept through the house took with it the many things on this room's walls.  A need to start over with empty space so that thoughts could have no boundaries kept those walls bare for years.

At some point, the gift of a Bodhi leaf got hung near the alter.  It was hung even higher after the cat decided it was a toy to knock down.  But the rest of the room stayed open and clear of anything except one's imagination.

Then one day, during a visit with Jutta, the Mariner and I saw this new work and fell in love. 


Jutta didn't want to take money for it because she loves us and doesn't do art for money. But we had to buy it because we love her and art and no one who can do art this good should do it for free.

And the minute it was hung, it was as if it had always been home.

With thanks to the Mariner for the first draft.

**
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**

SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT:  

COMING SOON FRIDAY'S CHILD (LOVING AND GIVING) 

Her New York is teaming up with Social Tee's Animal Rescue and every Friday will feature a wonderful Friday Child that is waiting to join someone's family and make their house a home.

Stay tuned!

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Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Encore: Perfect Timing

There's a lot of waiting when it comes to writing and sometimes it can feel like full out avoidance.  However, after a TV-watching-marathon of British women going into labor and giving birth to babies, perfect timing seemed to be more about allowing life to emerge on its own terms, rather than planning and making a schedule.  

Sure, there's lots you can do to help, like bouncing on a ball or screaming or eating chocolate pudding -  all strategies that work for both birthing and writing.  But, mostly you gotta bow to the forces that be, because they're just going to do what they need to do.

So, while allowing words to emerge, an encore about what Perfect Timing sometimes looks like.

Originally posted Tuesday, December 27, 2011

PERFECT TIMING
Right before it all happened

The frame was too high on Dana's new bed. Getting up was like rock climbing and getting down was the Giant Salom but without the snow.

So we ordered a new one, thinking it would arrive in a couple of days.

But then the new computer system didn't work. So the frame arrived a week later.

We thought oh so we'll come down on that day.

But then Dana asked we come the next day.

I promised we'd be there at such and such a time, but of course we got there almost an hour later.

Then the Mariner couldn't get the frame to line up and I didn't help by insisting that one side was longer than the other when in fact it was just angled more like a trapezoid and he was trying to re-angle it in between me whipping out a 12 inch ruler once used in PS 110 by Dana's son to prove that in fact that side of the bed frame was longer.

Finally the bed fit perfectly and Dana could sit down on it without any athletic training.

She insisted we stay for lunch and have tea and kaiser rolls, herring and lox, cream cheese and butter, and lots and lots of rugelach. The apple pie we passed on.

There was no way we could use the frame that was too high. It was pointless to keep it. But it was a really good frame and no one wanted to throw it out. So the Mariner taped up and stuck a piece of paper on it that said "free bed frame! new!"

Before we headed down to the communal recycling room, Polly the cat needed love. "I want a picture of that!" Dana said. So the Mariner rummaged through my crowded bag of screwdrivers and shopping bags, found the camera case, pulled out the camera and took a picture. The second after he clicked the shutter, Polly had enough love and jumped down.

I forgot the right elevator was the shabbos elevator, stopping on every floor from 1 to 20. So we got off on the 14th floor and waited for the not-for-shabbos left elevator. The numbers let us know whoever had gotten on at the 12th floor was being detoured up to us.

We stepped in with our almost brand new but too high bed frame and there was an almost coordinated, neatly dressed, middle aged couple, laundry stuff in hands, annoyed their trip down had been interrupted with a brief trip up.

Until they saw the frame.

"Are you giving it away?" they both asked.

"Yes! Do you want it?" asked the Mariner.

"Yes! We need one!" and without much ado, he handed the couple the barely used, month old, too high bed frame.

**
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***

SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT:  

COMING SOON FRIDAY'S CHILD (LOVING AND GIVING) 


Her New York is teaming up with Social Tee's Animal Rescue and every Friday will feature a wonderful Friday Child that is waiting to join someone's family and make their house a home.

Stay tuned!

Related Post:

Going Where It's Warm

Sunday, March 10, 2013

Sunday Memories: In The Garden Of Eden There Are Stars Up Above


As a little girl, I never looked up at the stars because there weren't any there.  They only existed in children's books.  I didn't even know what a constellation was, that complex relationships between each star, until I was a teenager at a music program in the middle of what felt like a primeval forest.  The meeting didn't go well, especially after I was told all those stars were already dead and we were just getting the news through twinkles thousands of light years old.

But a constellation of little moments and brief memories suddenly splayed against a busy life. 

The little baby girl toddling fiercely down Second Avenue, proud parents dressed smartly in Expensive Bohemian, beaming proudly and me grinning at the baby, but realizing they wouldn't know what it would be like to have every single person on the street know that baby's business until it was in its fifties.

And that made me think of Gary, who when he was little living in the tough housing projects on the other side of the Williamsburg Bridge, would look into the Courtyard and think, "Oh this must be the Garden of Eden."  After his family moved in, there was nothing he or B. or any of the other siblings could do without his parents hearing about it.  Even after he moved to the East Village, even after he moved back to Grand Street, even after that time in Israel, even after... Everybody knew everything.

Even living in his own apartment in a different building than his family on Grand Street his mother called one day, recounting the several people who asked why he had come home so late the night before.

Watching that baby, I remembered the last time  me and Gary spoke, bumping into each other on Second Avenue.  He was going to attempt to fit into the world he had been born into but had never quite felt at home in.  He died before it could happen.

There had to be a picture of the Courtyard, I thought, the place where nothing we did went unnoticed.  I remembered there was one of me an almost teenager, but the only one I could find was me in the little skirt I loved so much and wore so proudly.  It, like almost everything else we wore, was a hand-me-down and I remembered the day I understood things were changing because it wasn't fitting the same anymore.  But like so much of those years, I didn't know who to tell and so that moment like so many went unspoken and into a quiet reservoir of silence.

And that made me think of an old friend, recently back in touch, telling me about the moment he claimed the clothes he always knew he was born to wear, not the dresses forced upon him because everyone saw him as a  girl. 

And that made me remember, remember so much of how me or Gary or this old friend were seen and yet unseen, witnessed and yet not known.

Maybe that fierce baby girl would never know what it was like to have billions of eyes on her life, but maybe her parents would always see who she was.

**

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Thursday, March 7, 2013

Janis Ian Was Wrong

The Manhattan Bridge.


Peering over the railing we could see the Brooklyn one down the river.  That one was like the prettiest cheerleader who was sure to be chosen as Homecoming Queen. 
 

But the Manhattan Bridge was definitely the poet or the artist or the trombone player in the band, the one who didn't look like she had stepped out of a teen magazine.


No. The Manhattan Bridge was the bridge that would, while pretty stayed pretty and got lots of attention, go far and do great things.

 **
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Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Jutta's Kitchen Still Fighting Strong, Still Kicking Butt

An glimpse into Jutta's life which she paints with fire and with soul.








When we leave, I ask myself again.   You, you with all your dreams and passions.  Did you do enough today?

**
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Sunday, March 3, 2013

Sunday Memories: The Fountain Of Youth


How did Florence and Seymour know soda was so bad for you? 

Somehow they did and that meant that beyond the once-a-week-at-Gramma's, it just wasn't allowed.  Drinking soda was something I watched in other people's worlds or on TV. 

On our rare trips to Katz for a hotdog, Dr. Brown's Cream Sodas were even rarer. So, a lot of time was spent at Katz's water fountain, all the way in the back along the wall, across from the ladies room.  

That magic lever was the closest I'd get to a fountain soda for years.  I gulped glass after glass of water that was crisp and clear and delicious.   Not like the cloudy, luke-warm tap water we had at home.

Just the other night, one of our rare trips to Katz, but this time for a shared brisket sandwich, I had a Dr. Brown's Cream Soda.  After all, I was an adult and I could have anything I wanted.  But, half way into the meal, I was back at the best water fountain in the world.  It was delicious.

**
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Thursday, February 28, 2013

Before It Disappears, More Brief Moments


Goglog said most of the 14th Street stretch had been bought by a developer and wouldn't be there much longer, Vanishing New York passed on the news that Applebees and Johnny Rockets were probably headed to Coney Island, and NYU continued to think it owns public land.

There was a story I grew up with, passed around the Lower East Side.  It had happened. In Brooklyn.

A village had been condemned to death by the Nazis.  The villagers picked one person to escape and go tell their story so their deaths would not be in vain.  The man they picked somehow made his way to safety and then to America.  Relatives of the villagers were in Brooklyn and he came and for three days he told the story of the village, the murders, the Nazis.  At the end of the three days, the man died.

We are much luckier than those villagers.   When you don't get shot, sometimes you get to go on to find new ways and create new lives.  But, sometimes, even if you don't get shot, destruction strikes.  I do not want to die after telling the story of my village headed to destruction.  I don't want my village to die either.  But, now it seems more important than ever the story gets told.

Avenue A Bus looks at 14th Street.

Some things have continued on.
The sunset over 37th Street

Allen and Grand.


Back staircases in walk-ups


Real New Yorkers.

But some things didn't.

St. Vincent Hospital, now becoming luxury condos,

Florence.

 **
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Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Stories From the Crossing

Crossing Delancey on the Avenue A
It was rush hour on the Avenue A which is why the walker lady with the sheitel and a hat had rushed the door in front of the wheelchair who was wearing a cap my dad used to wear.

Everyone chimed in with the bus driver for her to move out of the way, but all she heard was noise until he waved her back.

The old man in the wheelchair only had one leg, one eye, an orthodox beard and one friend as old and hairy as he was who wheeled him into the parking spot on the bus for wheelchairs. 

The 4:30, hurtling down to the East River, was packed, what between the teachers and the kids coming home from school, the hospital workers getting out, the errands being finished, the subway riders transferring over.  The wheelchair's friend moved back a bit,  and hanging out by a pole, pulled out his New York Post and started reading.

The walker lady got a seat from someone, one of the single seats along the windows.  The woman behind her, who was fighting middle age with a vengeance, tapped her on the shoulder.  "Your wheels are on my bag."  The walker lady couldn't lift her walker, so finally the middle aged woman moved it for her, hugged her freed bags and glared at me. 

"What could I do..." murmured the walker lady.  Her accent, I hadn't heard it in years, but it was born of diaspora and several languages, one barely spoken anymore and I was suddenly back in the courtyard with the old ladies chortling in this woman's voice "monkey monkey" when B. hung upside on the railing.

Three tiny girls with huge backpacks of school books teetered in the aisle because the driver, no matter how many tattoos he had, was a cowboy.  The walker lady patted her walker seat.  "You wanna sit here? Come.  Sit, sit."

Yeshiva boys with matching loafers got on.  "Hi Ari, you Ok?  You doing OK?" one asked the man in the wheelchair.  "Yeah, yeah," he said, shifting himself in the chair and going back to staring out the window.

The Puerto Rican woman, my age, jeans and a warm parka, grabbed a sudden free seat across the aisle from the walker lady.   Their eyes met.

Beaming smiles and little waves across small space, the Puerto Rican woman asked, "You OK? You doing OK?"  "Nothing to complain about, nothing to complain about, everything good good," the walker lady said, then asked "You? You OK?" "Yeah, yeah.  Everything good." 

An elderly lady with tons of bags got on and eight people jumped up to give her a seat but she refused, instead gave it to the young woman who was blind instead.  No one had noticed the cane, just the pretty face, nicely made up.   The old lady and the young woman spoke Spanish to one another as polite strangers do.

More people got on, more people said hello to one another, more people got up to give more people their seats.  The African-American man, had to be at least 75 or 80 but only from the gray all over, he was very fit, said no, no, I'm fine, thank you.   Even if he wanted to sit down, that generation? Nah. You don't take a seat from a lady.

The little boys in the back being escorted home from school talked loudly to their earnest moms who shopped at Whole Foods and now filled the Lower East Side privatized co-ops with relief because it was affordable housing to them.  One little boy shouted questions that had words he knew you weren't suppose to shout in public.  "Are you pregnant?  Did the house make you pregnant?"  And his tired mom said, "Yes, that's it..." laughing to her friends.

And then Columbia Street came and the wheelchair and the friend and the yeshiva boys got off and suddenly the bus was empty.

Dana was waiting.

I was only half an hour late and there was much to cover.  Boy, was that bus packed and everybody talking, I said. I'll probably write about it tonight.  Well, she replied, you hear the best stories on the Avenue A.

**
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Sunday, February 24, 2013

Sunday Memories: Hot Lunch


We were talking about the difference between men artists and women artists when Kosky said, "well, there's much more pressure on women socially."  He wasn't expected to show up or do things or be all available.  He could disappear or send his regrets or not even answer at all and no one would question it.  He was an artist and had important work to do. 

I, on the other hand, had struggled for years to not answer the phone or not show up or not agree to help out.

I thought about that when I pulled out the old skillet this morning.  It was the one I had used several times a week during junior high school.  Home for lunch, I would whip up eggs, dunk in some bread, and fry away on the skillet while Florence kept practicing.  French toast was the only thing, besides a bologna sandwich, I knew how to cook for myself.   

There was nothing unusual about any of this, until much, much later, when I repeatedly heard the anger and judgement about women who chose their vocation over the needs of others.

It made me think of Lucien Freud who was almost herald for his refusal to be part of the many families he created.   His children, at least according to one of his daughters, had to meet him on his terms if they wanted any connection with him.

Cooking up french toast this morning for the first time sine 1972, I thought about how Florence, despite a crippling civil war within, managed to reclaim small spaces in which she could be, not the words of Mom or Wife or Teacher, but herself.  I thought about how in order to save herself, she taught me as much as she could about self-sufficiency and then sent me out into the world quickly so that both of us could survive.

And so, we both did. 

**
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And what Hot Lunch was actually like in High School except not as choreographed (and the stairs were a bit more hidden)

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