Monday, September 15, 2008

A Visit to the Hospital: Part One

The Long and Winding Road

We all had great hope it would go away. But it didn't.

I was still putting back together small pieces of a recently and sudden broken life - I just wanted a bit more time before another 10 hours in the ER.

I kept asking Gabriella (with great hope), "Maybe it's a cold?"
Gabriella kept saying "I don't know".

I couldn’t ask Penny who had opinions on these kinds of things.  She was on vacation.

Then Penny’s substitute home attendant and the recreational therapist both said something.

I finally asked Doctor Russia  (with great hope), "Maybe it's a cold?"
He said, "No, it's not cold. Bring her to ER.  It is best.  They’ll do X-Rays…”

Then Gabriella said (with great hope), "She seems better!"

But the next morning it was still there.  And when I got down to her apartment I knew it was not a cold. Her chest heaved up and down like Signory Weaver in Ghost Busters when Weaver got possessed.

So we began the long and winding…

"You're doing great," I told her.

"You're just saying that. I'm a mess,” she said.

I couldn’t stop laughing. "You're right. You're a mess."

"It's all your fault,” she reminded me.

When the ER nurse asked her, "Do you know where you are?", Florence answered, "I'm not home." 

Time, Time, Time, See What's Become of Me

What to bring to a day at the ER:

Water bottle
Your own spoon
Pens and highlighter case
Filofax with all the numbers to contact in case of...
Prayer bag with sutra book and beads
Extra camera
LL Bean catalog to distract Florence
Swimming to Antarctic by Lynne Cox to distract me
Journal to write everything down

You Can Hear the Ocean Roar In The Dangling Conversation

"I'm not going to say no in this place."

"Did you think a little nothing in the morning could keep me here all day?"

"I have unsettled things in my body."

"Claire. Are you Claire or Louise?"

"When do I get up in the morning?"
Me: When you wake up in the morning.
"Oh fuck."

"I swear if I ever get past here I'll shoot you."

Doctor: Where are we? What kind of building is it?
"Oh, it's a swell building."

"Help me."
Me: What do you need?"
"Somebody's hand."

"I love you.
Me: I love you.
"I never said that to anybody."
Me: I know
"How do you know?"

"Everything will be alright."